19 August 2007
Subject: China-themed Email List


Hullo all,

So I've updated my list of who's naughty and who's not. Let me know if you would prefer: not to get extensive ramblings about how ricrackulous it is to be in China, not to receive duplicate emails at different addresses belonging to your same self, or if you would like email at an entirely different address than what I have on file for you.

I've added quite a few of you since the first edition, so please write and complain vociferously if I've left you out and you want the first missive. (And if this is the case, erm, you should know that I've moved to China :P)

Some gratuitous ramblage:

Mitch Valentine and I went out to K.K club last night and danced until after 4:00 am. The juxtaposition of shitting in a hole in the ground with the most elaborate and technically advanced lighting system I've ever seen was boggling. We brought home two sweet Chinese girls and stayed up playing on the beach until well after the sun rose. We ran about mucking in the sand and I learned how to yell "SAU SHANG HAU!" at the old men in speedos doing their morning things in the water. I scratched with a stick in the sand all the characters I had learned the day before, and the girls corrected me until I got the stroke order right. A day and a half in China and I am already having basic conversations and asking for iced mochas in cafes and prices of fruits in markets.

Oh! Yesterday, I purchased a flattened globe of a dark purple-black fruit that I didn't recognize. I brought it home, cut it open, tasted it, and squealed. My inner fruit bat threw a twitter-fit, so I had to jump up and just twirl and twirl about in the kitchen. Because it was fresh mangosteen. Mrr! My father is now purple-blackish with envy, and you may all now follow suit.

I'll start work tomorrow, get oriented (HAH! a little late for that! See, it's funny because... I'm already in the Orient. The east... uh, nevermind. I'll leave the rest of the pun for Trevor to finish... give 'im sommit to do). Right, school. Planning, putting together 20 individual study abroad programmes with Kanuckistani, New Zealandish, Aussie, and maybe even American schools.

Pre-S.: I'm thrilled to be here.

WO AI XIAMEN!

Now for some passport photo extravaganza and residence application processes. I guess I'll be here for a while, but don't forget!: Les quiero muchisisimo.

?Molly (Jasmine)

P.S.: The *huggle*beast now besets you. You choose to run away. You turn left and skip down the hallway. You see a red snorkle-dongle in the middle of the path. You decide to collect it. You slowly realize, as you bend to pick it up, that they DON'T MAKE snorkle-dongles in red!!! Suddenly, the object springs up and bites your nose! It was a puddle of face-kisses!!! The *huggle*beast is now upon you and you are helpless to resist.